back to the basic

the silent brought me back to the basic...like my post before..silent is like a gold,tear is like my blood...im finding the conclusion ..all these...but i still cant find it...i want to....want to back to the basic...but i still not allowed to back,....

my memories ..will always there..about "he".....im finding something that i would never found...i never tell n described what im looking ..it only me ...that will understand....tear like my blood...never separate,n always there.....i just feel want to cry now....can u understand why im crying?? can u??? would u??

i wish ..there is someone that would tell me that..." dont be fake,,dont cry anymore,,i 'll be there for you".....

it so late in midnight..still alone...wanna cup of milo???

drop...

my tear drop one by one....thinking about my mistake...thinking about the passed,thinking about the reason...i got it...i know why...it just i still dont understand y i still cant do it...to forget what happen...just a moment...

i looked at the sky and fond by it..i look at the people and thinking what life they has been trough?? and then i look again and realize how small i am and lonely.....i still fooled by the word "life"... but i know what happen is the best...

so,,,,all what happen is the best.... for me...

do you??~~~

now im trying to do something else,working...but then i realise ..that it doesnt change..the emptiness ... i close my eyes to hold my tear...it happen suddenly...even when there is so many people...

i looked for something...the lost pieces...but it already lost...where i can find it??? i hate myself for unable to do something....i lost in the light and there no one suspicious...that the great part...i played my role..and no one know...hope tomorrow gonna be a great day...

my memories....never found but it also never lost...

sky....~~~

sky is not always beautiful...i always looked the sky and try to understand it...well the pattern.. and sometime i also hope that the sky will understand me too...its funny... my life is going well..for now..

each day passed...it already 2 years and 3 month...im counting it to make me remember...actually i dont want,,it just ..it hard to forget.. my spm 's result is great..it enough for me..alhamdulillah..
all these dream...what else i can say???..silent is like a gold for me...lonely is like my blood.. no word can described,,only sky...can anyone understand???

so close to the end...everyone chasing to the final,,but im...im still standing there ,,telling myself to run to the final...but deep in my heart..i hope 2 years ago or more,,,somebody will pull my hand and save me..but nobody there..everyone gone...im smiling and i dont even know if it real or fake...

i try to forget but it hard...the silent brought me to the deep part of my brain and squeeze the memories part..and then the tears....drop one by one...what else i can say...???